When He addressed the nations alongside His disciples, He proclaimed, "If anyone wishes to come after Me, let him deny himself, take up his cross, and follow Me." Reflect on the significance of Christ's proclamation; it encompasses not just minor aspects but the entirety of our existence. Who among us would not desire to follow our Savior and Lord? It is the essence of our faith to pursue Him as the Fountain of truth, our moral compass in virtue, and the epitome of holiness. Our trust is rooted in Him as our Redeemer from all ills, the Sovereign of eternal life. From our faith in Christ and our commitment to following Him, we anticipate everything. Thus, it is vital for each of us to comprehend what this following entails, including who genuinely follows Christ and attains the ultimate goal, compared to those who mistakenly believe they do while failing to reach their intended destination. Indeed, the Savior Himself desires to guide us in understanding what it means to follow Him. Can we be indifferent to such a message? Let us reiterate: Whoever is concerned for the salvation of their soul, whoever sincerely wishes to be a Christian, must pay close attention to the Savior's words. If you fulfill the conditions for salvation, as He Himself established, then you are on the right path: secure and blessed, even if you are considered the least in the world. But if you are not under this law, if the heavenly standard does not apply to you, then, regardless of who you are or what you mean to society, you are in grave danger; if you remain as you are, you risk eternal separation. To facilitate our understanding of this crucial matter, let us consider each word of the Savior with diligence, as though our eternal life and salvation depend on it (and indeed they do).
"If anyone desires to follow Me, let him deny himself!" This self-denial is essential, though it is often unsavory to our nature. Yet, as experience reveals, it is a necessity in significant undertakings. For instance, whether one embarks on learning, one must suppress one’s own thoughts and accept what the teacher imparts. Similarly, in warfare, soldiers must set aside personal desires to obey their commanding officer. In seeking healing from a serious illness, one places complete trust in the medical professional. This approach is typical in worldly endeavors. Should we then be surprised that self-denial is the starting point of our salvation, or, in other words, of following Christ? But how should this self-denial manifest, and to what extent? In practical matters, self-denial manifests vastly. A soldier, for instance, carries this principle to the extent of readiness to face death at the command of even a subordinate leader. Consequently, should we be astonished that Christian self-denial extends to the willingness to die? Yes, it reaches that far. We would not speak truthfully if we suggested that the self-denial our Lord asks of His followers applies only to abandoning some sinful thoughts, desires, or actions; rather, it demands the rejection of our entire sinful nature and unredeemed will. This is not limited to specific situations or times; it is to be constant and all-encompassing throughout our lives. Furthermore, this consistent and total self-renunciation must cultivate a true self-loathing, as affirmed in the Gospel: "But if anyone comes to Me and does not hate... his own life, he cannot be my disciple" (Luke 14:26). Regardless of how stringent this demand may seem, it is as essential as it is natural in our current state. For, as sinners, there is little worthy of love within us, yet ample reason to despise ourselves. In turn, when we despise that which we ought to, self-denial becomes manageable; it is far more challenging to forsake what we hold dear. Thus, the follower of Christ, to succeed in self-denial, must strive to develop self-hatred: when one truly loathes oneself, denial becomes a close companion.
But how is one to cultivate self-hatred, when, by nature, we all seek to love ourselves? How do those who have awakened their consciences and wish to be punished hate themselves? How does someone suffering from a grave malady loathe his existence and call for death? How does one burdened with life’s monotony despise themselves and reject the light of God? In such cases, our loathing exceeds all boundaries. Yet, when it comes to denying ourselves in order to follow the Lord toward everlasting life, we hesitate and ponder: how can we hate ourselves? By understanding ourselves. When you realize you are clothed in a filthy, tattered, revolting garment, you instantly cast it aside and would never consider putting it back on. Acknowledge, then, that your true sensual life resembles such attire, and you will grow to detest your fleshly desires and reject your sinful self. Similarly, if you were to discover snakes in your favored space, you would flee at once, preferring a humble dwelling instead; when you recognize that poisonous desires take residence in your heart, you will loathe your spirit and long to be rid of it. Likewise, if you knew you were afflicted with a fatal illness, you would eagerly forsake yourself, wishing to escape to the farthest corners of the earth. Yet know, dear ones, that you are plagued by the lethal poison of sin, which inevitably leads to eternal death, and you will be disposed not only to dislike but to genuinely detest yourself, thus fulfilling the demands of the Heavenly Physician to wholly deny yourself for the sake of following Him.
Nevertheless, without self-denial, one cannot take even a single proper step in following the Lord. Consider this: how could you dare abandon your own path and pursue the Lord's if you do not renounce yourself as your leader? One follows others when one does not trust oneself; one ceases to be self-reliant only when convinced of one’s deficiencies. It would be a different scenario if the Lord led you by your own principles, but He calls you to a new path, often in stark contrast to your previous way of life, requiring what contradicts your former thoughts and desires, your sinful existence. How will you accomplish that which the Lord requires without relinquishing your old mindset, desires, or inclinations? How will you embrace the mysteries of faith, which surpass the wisdom of the mind? How can you honor yourself as the foremost of sinners and love your enemies without significant self-denial? How can one crucify sinful passions and lusts without hating one’s own soul? This presents a clear contradiction! Thus, what are the outcomes for those who refuse to deny themselves while imagining they are following the Lord? They entertain thoughts of following Him but instead pursue their own desires: some chase after knowledge, others follow their hearts or their passions, and still others are swayed by contemporary customs and the actions of others. It cannot be otherwise; to follow the Lord, one must, per His command, "let him deny himself": this is the initial, essential condition and the first step toward heaven.
The next requirement and the second step is this: "let him take up his cross!" The cross serves as an instrument of death; it is necessary when dealing with the criminal that must be executed: who is that criminal? Ourselves: our worldly nature, our sinful desires, our selfish love, our entire fallen self. By rejecting these, we achieve much but remain far from complete. The old self cannot merely lie dormant after being rejected, as an unwanted piece of clothing; instead, it resembles a fierce beast that, even when overcome, becomes more aggressive and perilous the more it is attacked. One of two things must occur: we must either destroy the defeated self or submit to its assaults. With what shall we vanquish our adversary, namely our carnal nature, our ego and desires, our sinfulness and pride? With our own thoughts? As the apostle asserts, until one is renewed from above, one’s mind is clouded by pride and must be put to death. With one’s will? However, it is so weak that it "wills," as the apostle explains, "but does not find the ability to perform what is good" (Rom. 7:18). And how can our will combat our selfish tendencies? We require a firm, outward instrument of self-denial; thus, we are commanded to take up the cross, which means embracing all that crucifies our selfishness and evil desires. Consequently, the cross encompasses poverty and deficiencies, dishonor and slander, sickness and weakness, difficult relationships, unfruitful marriages, and tragedies. This cross of hardships, trials, temptations, and tribulations must be taken up, meaning chosen and absorbed, if one seeks to be a true follower of Christ. This acceptance must come not like a criminal forced to carry out an execution: begrudgingly and resentfully; rather, it must be embraced voluntarily, with eagerness, in response to God's will, driven by love for our salvation, firmly assured of its necessity and benefits. Only in such a way will the cross become healing, marking one as a follower of Christ and a symbol of true Christianity. Without such a voluntary, rational acceptance of the cross, it remains a burden that stifles and burdens, rather than revives.
We must understand that the experience of bearing hardships is unavoidable in our earthly existence; none can escape it. Every person must endure some form of suffering in this life, just as the robber who scorned Him bore the burden alongside Christ. Yet that cross, lifted not by choice but imposed by necessity, provides no salvation; it only inflicts torment and suffering without purpose. Notably, the Savior directs His followers to take up their own cross—the one designated for them from above. The corrupted will tends to impose its own substitutes, preferring a self-made test rather than accepting God's designated challenges. An individual, for instance, is meant to endure trials through family and community life, yet instead yearns for the crosses of solitude. Such choices lead us into unanticipated hardships and dangers, cloaked as harmless choices but ultimately proving detrimental! The primary danger lies in yielding to our own willfulness, which must first be surrendered and crucified.
No, beloved soul seeking to follow Christ, when you have truly denied yourself and determined to accompany the Lord to Golgotha, you will no longer seek to select your own crosses, instead choosing what has been divinely prepared for you. Indeed, it has long been awaiting you! Since the cross is a mandate for everyone, Divine Providence arranges our lives such that each person carries their own cross, their own burdens, temptations, and grievances. This divine cross is genuine and life-affirming, for it is not of human origination but crafted by God Himself. Therefore, whoever wishes to follow the Lord must prioritize discovering their own cross, rather than attempting to bear foreign burdens that do not pertain to them, else they risk becoming overwhelmed. Does this mean there is no room for personal authority or sacrifices? There absolutely is! It is crucial first to agree to endure hardships and tribulations sent by God—those inherent to our worldly conditions—and then, if we are diligent and the situation warrants, to also engage in voluntary sacrifices. However, even in those givens, we must ensure we take upon ourselves a cross fitting for our circumstances, one that aligns with our capabilities, humility, and genuine self-giving.
THEOSIS