Romans 12:15Meaning & Commentary from the Church Fathers

Therefore the Apostle placed this first. Nothing disposes us to love so much as sharing both joy and sorrow with one another. Do not estrange yourself from compassion because you stand far from the misfortune. When your neighbor suffers evil, you must regard his misfortune as common to you. Share his tears, so that you may lighten his sorrow. Share his joy, so that you may confirm his gladness, strengthen love, and receive benefit before he does. Through weeping you become merciful, and through joy you are purified from envy and ill will. See how unburdensome Paul’s commandment is. He did not say, “deliver him from distress,” lest you object that this is often impossible. He prescribed something easier, entirely within your power. If you cannot avert the misfortune, shed tears, and by this you will already drive much away. If you cannot increase his prosperity, bring your joy, and by this you will already give great relief. Therefore the Apostle commands not only that we should not envy, but, what is much greater, that we should rejoice together. This means far more than not envying.

But since offenses in common life are not everywhere present, compassion rarely meets obstacles to its manifestation. By contrast, rejoicing with others presupposes preferring the well-being of others to one’s own well-being. In the natural order, however, self-love prevailing in the heart makes one think and feel contrary to this.

The well-being of another directly offends selfhood, which, instead of rejoicing with him, is tormented by envy. So it is in the natural order of life.

But when grace comes and gives life to the spirit, then, together with its enkindling, selfless love for the brethren is also reborn. Yet it does not at once embrace the whole being, but rises to flame through struggle with selfhood.

The measure of the suppression of selfhood becomes the measure of the elevation of love. When selfhood has wholly melted away, love begins to burn with flame. Then rejoicing with others and sorrowing with others are manifested in full strength.

Until then, they are preserved sincerely only through struggle. This struggle means the self-conquering arousal and preservation, against oneself, of the feelings of rejoicing with others and compassion.

It serves as the best means for progress in love, and for its elevation to the proper measure.

St. Chrysostom interprets these feelings at length: “The Apostle wants us to be warmed by love of friends. Therefore he added that we must grieve together and suffer together when we see that our neighbors have fallen into misfortune.

“Agreed, you will say. But if the Apostle had reason to prescribe that we grieve with those who weep, why did he give another commandment, to rejoice with those who rejoice, in which there seems to be no need?

“On the contrary, for rejoicing with those who rejoice, the soul needs more wisdom than for weeping with those who weep. Nature itself draws us toward the latter. There is no man of stone who would not weep at the sight of one in misfortune.

“But in order to see a man in prosperity, not only not to envy him, but even to share his joy, a very noble soul is required. Therefore the Apostle spoke of this first.

“What disposes us most of all to love is that we share one another’s joys and sorrows. Therefore do not withdraw from compassion because troubles are far from you. When your neighbor suffers evil, you must count his misfortune as though it were your own.

“Share his tears, so that you may lighten his sorrow. Share his joys, so that his gladness may become firmer and love more unbreakable. Then not only your neighbor, but you yourself will receive benefit.

“When you weep with him, you will be trained in mercy. When you rejoice with him, you will drive away envy and ill will.

“See how unburdensome Paul’s commandment is. He did not say, ‘Deliver him from trouble.’ Then you might object that in many cases this is impossible. On the contrary, the Apostle prescribed the easiest thing, which lies entirely within your will.

“If you cannot avert misfortune, shed tears, and by this you will greatly lessen it. If you cannot increase prosperity, add your joy, and by this you will add much to it.

“Therefore the Apostle commands not only that we not envy, but, what is far more important, that we rejoice together with our neighbor. For this means much more than not envying.”