1 Corinthians 7:6Meaning & Commentary from the Church Fathers

"But I say this as a concession, not as a command. For I wish that all men were as I myself am," in continence (1 Cor 7:6-7).

He often acts this way when teaching difficult works. He presents himself as an example and says: "Imitate me" (1 Cor 4:16).

"But each has his own gift from God, one in this way and another in that" (1 Cor 7:7). After uttering a sharp rebuke in the words, "because of your lack of continence," he again encourages them.

He says, "each has his own gift from God." He does not mean that this virtue requires no effort from us, but, as I have said, he is encouraging them.

That you should deprive yourselves of one another for a time, I said this, the Apostle says, as a permission, κατά συγγνώμην, that is, by condescension to your weakness, not as an unalterable command.

That which he is ashamed to call by its own name, that which he prefers to the temptation of Satan, that which has its foundation in lack of continence, this we labor to explain as obscure.

Yet he himself explained what he wrote: "But I say this by way of concession, not by command."

And we still interpret for ourselves that he does not call marriage a concession, but a command, as though second and third marriages were not permitted in the same way.

As though the doors of the Church were not opened through repentance even to fornicators, and what is more, even to the incestuous.

So far as this is said with regard to a benevolent and sensitive teacher, all wished to be like him as much as possible. What he himself is, he soon shows below: "Each has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that" (1 Cor 7:7). That is, each has God's gift according to his own offering, so that, if the Lord wills, he will receive the ability according to His will. Therefore no one should be forced to do what is unlawful. Let each choose for himself which path to take.

"But I say this by way of counsel, not by command. For I wish that all men were as I am."

The Apostle both indicated perfection in continence and condescended to small deficiencies. His word offered healing medicine for weakness, and also presents an example for choosing what is better.

The Apostle offered himself as the example, being compelled to disclose to us the wealth of his own purity.

"But each has his own gift from God, one in this way and another in that." He also comforted those living in marriage, calling marriage a gift of God.

Helped by the grace of God, a man makes progress in chastity even in married life. Grace helps those who bring good zeal from themselves, for it is said: "Ask, and it will be given you. Seek, and you will find."

"I speak by way of counsel, not by command." With these words the Apostle very well defines how his words concerning marriage and celibacy should be understood. He neither legislates anything nor abolishes anything. When he says, "It is good for a man not to touch a woman" (1 Cor 7:1), one cannot conclude from the opposite that it is not good to touch. And when he advises, "Let each man have his own wife," he does not make this a commandment for all.

"But I say this," that is, concerning the renewal of union, "as a permission, not as a command. For I wish that all men were as I myself am," that is, unmarried. "He presents himself as an example, being compelled to reveal to us the richness of his own purity" (Theodoret).

In giving spouses counsel concerning married life together, the Apostle first commands them to be guided by the mutual debt of marriage. They must neither exceed nor destroy it, but strengthen it by growing love.

This love begins with affection and passes into readiness to sacrifice everything for the beloved person. From this the Apostle's further counsel is understandable.

He counsels such mutual devotion between spouses that neither spouse has authority over himself, but each is servant to the other.

From this Saint John Chrysostom drew the following counsel: "When you see that a prostitute tempts you, say: my body does not belong to me, but to my wife. Let the wife say the same."

That spouses must abstain at certain times is also a law of nature. To this the law of pleasing God adds its own requirement. But how all this is to be arranged and ordered cannot be defined by prescriptions. It is left to the mutual agreement and prudence of the spouses. "By way of counsel" means: I offer it as counsel. "Not by command" means: I do not give it as a command. My word does not have the force of a legal prescription.