Saint Chrysostom says: “Saint Paul says these words both sincerely, that is, with sincere goodwill, and reprovingly, in case Philemon should refuse to receive the slave, when Saint Paul did not refuse to give for him a pledge in his own hand. By this he greatly moved Philemon and freed Onesimus from every burden. ‘I, Paul, have written it with mine own hand,’ he says. Nothing is more ardent, more zealous, or more impetuous than this heart!”
“Not to say to thee that thou owest me even thine own self besides.” That is, “through me thou wast counted worthy of salvation” (Theodoret). You owe me your salvation, your eternally blessed life. What earthly debt can be compared with this? Therefore I could have said to you: receive Onesimus, and do not reckon the damage he caused you. Count it toward the payment of the debt by which you yourself are indebted to me.
You owe me your very self, while what Onesimus owes you is a small part of your possessions. Even if he had destroyed all your property, this still would not compare with what you owe me. You owe me yourself, and what is your property in comparison with yourself?
Thus, if Onesimus had destroyed all your property and I asked you to forgive him everything as repayment for yourself, and you did so, even then you would not have repaid me fully for yourself. Much would still remain owing from you. But if for my sake you forgive that small amount which Onesimus owes you, it is not even worth entering into the account.
So, says the Apostle, I could have written to you without promising repayment for the loss. But I do not do this. On the contrary, I promise repayment and will indeed repay it. Thus all that I desire to receive from you is limited to this: that you graciously receive into favor Onesimus, my child and our brother in the Lord. Will you not do this for me, you who owe me your very self?
Such a thought is seen in Ambrosiaster: “The Apostle burdens Philemon himself with a greater debt, so that he may all the more willingly show mercy to the slave and through him pay some small part for himself” (paraphrase).
Saint Chrysostom sets forth the following motive for writing these words. The words, “I will pay; here is my pledge,” could have produced an unpleasant thought in Philemon’s soul, as though the Apostle did not trust him or believe that he was capable of such virtue, namely, forgiving Onesimus without self-interest. To ward off such a thought, the Apostle speaks to him as if saying: do not think that I am not confident in you. Do I not know that you feel you owe me even your very self? I need only say a word to you, and you will do everything. If I arrange this matter otherwise, there are other reasons for it, not any lack of confidence in you.
This is a broad paraphrase of Saint Chrysostom’s words, which are brief and compressed. “Lest it seem offensive to Philemon that the Apostle, asking him about a slave who was a thief, appears not to hope to receive what he asks, he corrects this also. ‘Not to say to thee,’ he says, ‘that thou owest me even thine own self besides.’ That is, thou owest not what is thine, but thyself. He said this out of love, by reason of mutual friendship, and because he relies on him exceedingly. See how everywhere he cares for both things, both to ask with full confidence and not to seem too bold.”
Oecumenius and Theophylact explain this thought more plainly. The latter writes: “Lest it seem reproachful to Philemon that the Apostle, as though not hoping in him, does not simply ask him about a slave who was a thief, but proposes payment and gives a pledge in his own hand, for this would suggest that Philemon was hardhearted and inattentive to his teacher. Lest this appear so, the Apostle by the quoted words gives him to understand that he trusts him and has great hope in him.”
Yet in these words one can see not only why the Apostle wrote them, but also why he did what is written. If the Apostle had asked Philemon to forgive without proposing repayment, those hostile to the Gospel could have said: see, he turns the Gospel and faith into a means for attaining worldly aims. He converted Philemon to the faith and now demands that he receive the slave who robbed him without requiring what was stolen.
So that they might not speak this way, and might not place reproach on our faith and the Gospel, I do not say to you, the Apostle writes, that since you owe me your very self, you should therefore freely forgive the offending slave. On the contrary, I promise to repay you the whole loss caused by the fugitive, and I ask, as a mercy, that you receive him into your good favor.
I do not turn the higher thing into a means for attaining the lower. Our faith does not disturb the established order of common life. It only places within it another spirit, which is from above, from the Lord.
THEOSIS