The insignificance of our weakness is highlighted by referring to You as ‘the Guardian of men,’ for unless Your saving hand shields us from the schemes of the hidden enemy, our vigilance is in vain, as the Psalmist states, unless the Lord guards the city, the watchman watches in vain; Psalms 126:1. We have fallen because of our own failings, and rising by our own strength is beyond our ability. We have sunk low due to our own free will, but the consequences of our guilt pull us even lower each day. We strive to regain the purity we have lost, yet we remain burdened by our own weight. Thus, it is rightly said, Why have You made me an adversary to You, so that I am a burden to myself? Job 7:20.
You have made man an adversary to himself when he turns away from You through sin. Captivated by the Serpent’s deceit, he becomes an enemy to You, disregarding Your commandments. The Creator’s righteousness positions man as His adversary, for he becomes Your foe through pride. This contrast created by sin intensifies the severity of man’s punishment, as he, being misguidedly free, serves his own corruption while the righteous servant rejoices in the freedom of incorruption. When he turns away from the healing refuge of humility, he is ensnared by his growing pride, and in his arrogance, he bows the neck of his heart, refusing to submit to Your commands while yielding to his own needs. This is particularly clear when we prioritize earthly desires over spiritual growth, causing the spirit to fall into subjugation when it is brought low.
It is evident that he suffers who is feverishly in pain; our physical condition called health is constricted by its own illness. When idle, it falls into disrepair; lacking nourishment, it is restored by food, yet overindulgence leads to loss of vigor. Water offers cleansing but can lead to excess; labor invigorates lest it becomes dull from inactivity; and rest is necessary to avoid physical exhaustion. In wakefulness, it seeks sleep; weariness from slumber prompts awakening, avoiding further fatigue; it is clothed against the cold, while heat drives it to seek comfort. Confronted with troubles from the very direction it sought to avoid, it becomes grievously injured and hinders its own healing. It is not merely an action of ours that leads to fever-induced pain; our very breath becomes a failing that resists the remedy it needs. In all our pursuits for relief, we often find remedies that turn into additional ailments, as what we thought would bring healing often leads to greater distress. Thus, the very arrogance of seeking wellness can lead to the downfall of humility.
Even if we attain an elevated state, we still carry the burdens of our faults daily. Our minds, distanced from the joyful refuge of Your inner sanctuary, are tossed between false hope and tormenting fear; at times overwhelmed by sorrow, at times ignited by misguided joy. Continuously clinging to ephemeral things, we suffer their loss, being forever altered in the process. Distracted by change, our inner selves are conflicted. Anxiously pursuing what is lacking, when we grasp it, we become discontent, often reversing our affections for what once brought us joy. Through suffering, we learn of true eternity; yet, upon relief from pain, we forget those lessons swiftly. Long is the journey to discover what truly matters, and gaining even a glimpse of higher truths brings us back to old habits, leaving us with only a fraction of enlightenment retained. Striving for knowledge, we labor to escape ignorance, then struggle against pride that follows; fighting to restrain the flesh, we still carry remnants of sin within, despite appearing outwardly subdued.
We seek to rise toward our Creator but remain confounded by the shadows that cling to us. We desire to understand how the incorporeal can govern the corporeal and find ourselves unable to comprehend it. We ponder questions with no answers, remaining perplexed despite our profound inquiries. We perceive ourselves as both significant and insignificant yet cannot accurately assess our true selves, for if we were not worthy of such inquiry, we would not delve into such depths, and if we were not small, we would grasp our inquiries.
This is why he states, You have made me an adversary to You, so that I am a burden to myself; for man, cast out, is burdened by fleshly weights and the turmoil of the mind and bears these burdens heavily. Every side confronts him with afflictions, as he grapples with his frailties, having deemed himself self-sufficient after abandoning You, yet finds only emptiness within. In restlessness, he seeks to escape, yet having put his Creator in nothingness, he has nowhere to escape. Even the wise aptly remarks, a heavy yoke is upon the sons of Adam, from the day they come forth from their mother’s womb to the day they return to the mother of all things; Sirach 40:1. The blessed Job, amidst his moans, seeks to understand why this is so ordered, not blaming justice but imploring mercy; in asking, he strikes at his own pride, hoping that Divine mercy may transform him. As if saying, why do You disregard a man who has become Your adversary, who, I am sure, does not wish even the one You have rejected to perish? Thus, he rightly progresses to express his submission through confession and poses a question of genuine inquiry.
THEOSIS