When the flesh of your body has grown frail, you may find yourself pondering, "How could I despise the discipline, while my heart turns away from correction?" The outer disasters previously mentioned will be accompanied by the inner anguish of belated remorse. In the midst of indulgence and excess, the voice of conscience and wisdom was muffled. Yet, there will come a moment when the reckless lifestyle can no longer be sustained; the body, worn out by sin, will succumb to time and the ailments that accompany such behavior, and the fervor of lust will dim. At that point, one will inevitably be compelled to gain clarity, to wholly recognize one's fault and folly, while simultaneously confronting the reality of irretrievable losses—be it health or wealth.
Read more (149 words)
One must then reflect: "How did I come to detest the suffering, and why has my heart turned away from admonition?" How did I descend into such folly that I not only ignored the guidance of those who cared for me, but also resented them and treated them with bitterness? I could not bear any intrusion into my life. There was a time when, after taking a reckless step, I could still halt my progress on the path of wrongdoing; my neighbors, friends, parents, and spouse warned me of my transgressions, but my heart was so hardened that their calls fell on deaf ears. I could not tolerate the voice of truth, which came to decry my actions; I resisted believing the warnings, despite the fact that they eventually came to pass. The opportunity to avert disaster has passed; it is irreversible now, leaving only the burden of regret.